anxiety · social anxiety · The Journey

Still climbing…..though its unsteady

 Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m not really doing much to overcome what I’ve made my journey which is to kick my social anxiety’s butt! there has been things going on in my personal life that I have to credit as being part of the reason I am feeling this way but it still doesn’t make it easier.

two-anxiety attacks-with lots of tears

I had to get reminded by my sister (thank god I have her) that I need to think more positive practice the therapy they’ve advice to try so I can cope then overcome.

Its way easier said than done!

Though I’m so grateful to have her and others around me that care I’ve become really distant and a bit mean but I can’t help it when I’m feeling so hopeless and frustrated anyone else get this way?

Specially when you feel like everyone is moving forward and you are stuck at the same place and can’t seem to move, when your staring at the job application but still can’t seem to fill it out or when you just feel like staying in your safe place and never coming out!

I’ve been having some rough days, weeks…..and I don’t want to depend on just my therapy sessions or medication but I’m trying to train my thoughts that, that isn’t a bad thing because I’m not depending on them I’m actually needing them because I’m trying to better myself.

Social Anxiety is not fun (no wonder they call it SAD) when you feel like everyone is achieving and you’re failing and as much as people try and tell you that you aren’t failing that you’re so brave because your doing something about it.

When you’re having bad days……with those negative irrational thoughts that won’t seem to want to go away it makes it seem like the latter you’re trying so hard to climb with scraped knees and bruised feet is never ending and reaching the top seems impossible.

What a journey…..What a journey…….What a damn journey this is!

but…..

I ain’t given up because I have to believe I will reach that top even when I’m feeling so defeated.

emilysquotes-com-wisdom-time-promise-relax-breathe-patient-inspirational-mandy-hale

 

 

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2 thoughts on “Still climbing…..though its unsteady

  1. This post reflects exactly how I feel all the time trying to live with social anxiety. I always perceive everyone else has so much going on in their lives while I have nothing. And I feel so bad that at times even accomplishing the smallest things, like filling in and turning in a job application (I’ve been unemployed for the last 3 years, too) feels like an emotional and anxiety ridden hardship I don’t want to bother with. And when I do accomplish something, I beat myself up about the things I didn’t do as well as I had hoped, or the accomplishment barely makes a dent in raising my self esteem.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think with social anxiety, I tend to read a lot about it, I/we might always feel like everyone is always ahead of us because our mind is just in that place like I said feeling stuck no matter if we do accomplish things but its up to us to try and remind ourselves that we’re doing the best we can and that should be more than just a small victory. I’m just trying to keep my mind positive at the moment even though like I said in my post I’ve been having really bad days where I’m just overthinking everything even the fact that I’m getting help FINALLY but still not seeing the results I had hoped but everything takes time that’s why I try and focus on other things not just my social anxiety or else I’ll go crazy! but having this disorder in my 20’s really is hard.

      Liked by 1 person

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