Here’s a different type of update one that isn’t so sad or dark like they have been as of late.
The last week or so I have felt a bit more “happy” you could say I don’t know maybe is the fact that a bit of the stress has been taken off my back and I feel like I can actually breath a bit.
That has been a big help.
I’ve also realize that after taking my medication for awhile now I’m actually starting to feel a bit different which is weird because not so long ago (by long I mean days) I was saying how I didn’t think they were doing anything for me.
Maybe it all had to do with the stress I was currently experiencing or maybe I was just sad that my sister was leaving at a critical time in our lives where our family helping each other was and is our best bet.
So today I woke up early and though my mind was already racing with thoughts about the weird and realistic dreams I’ve been having once I got over that and had my breakfast my mood stayed balanced and I didn’t feel the need to go and hide away in my room.
In a way I feel like I’m seeing the world again with a that bit of positivity I felt when I started this blog where every new obstacle or step I accomplished I cherished it and took it as a gain in the right direction instead of drowning it with the things I still have yet not done.
So I’m going to try my hardest to not let myself become my own worst enemy, to not let myself be my very own bully and just praise and live off, of those moments when I do something I would have never done before.
If have those bad days (which I probably will) again I’ll know now that although they seem never ending and they get to me so deep in my soul where I just feel like I don’t deserve to be happy and I’ll probably post about them here I’ll know they will not last and I’ll be able to see through the fog again.